Voici un article humoristique de Lore Sjöberg issu du site wired.com traitant des « supertaskers », individus capables de faire 36 choses à la fois sur leurs gadgets technologiques.
Morceaux choisis :
A scientific study has determined that 2.5 percent of adults are such massive wizards of multitasking that they can simultaneously drive and talk on their cellphones without killing everything you love.
It’s unknown how many of these “supertaskers” can, at the same time, keep an eye out for cops, but I hope it’s not all of them. I’d love to see a supertasker in court explaining, preferably while finishing off a tough boss fight in Final Fantasy Tactics on the PSP, why the laws of muggle society should not apply to such gifted folk as him.
I have my own observations about cellphone users, all backed up by my rigorous method of controlled experiments.
Here’s what I came up with:
A full 15 percent of cellphone users can simultaneously talk on the phone, order a latte and piss off an entire room full of cafe patrons. Most also have the ability to ignore the “please don’t use cellphones while ordering” sign on the register.
Only 62 percent of people can handle simultaneously being in a movie theater and having their cellphones set to vibrate. Also, 3 percent of theatergoers suffer from a congenital inability to refuse to take a cellphone call no matter where they are.
A week after getting their mobile phones, only 8.9 percent of purchasers can remember whether they opted for the “Family America Full-Coverage Unlimited Data Plan” or the “Unlimited Coverage Full-Data America Family Plan.” Three weeks after that, they discover they signed up for whichever one features a $75 fee for “roaming text multiline overage.”
You can make 45 percent of cellphone users want to upgrade their gear by taking the name of their current phone and adding a random letter to the end of the product name.
Fully 18 percent of cellphone users are concerned that using their phone will cause brain tumors. Only 7 percent are concerned that using their phone will lead to a face full of windshield glass.
Nearly 29 percent of consumers base their cellphone purchase on how much the little slide-out keyboard reminds them of their old Transformers toys. Another 4 percent base it on how much the keyboard reminds them of their current Transformers “collectibles.”
People holding their earbuds’ microphone up to their mouth break down as follows : 84 percent look like an idiot, 9 percent look like a moron, 6 percent look like an idiot dork moron cretin and 1 percent have invisibility powers.
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Born helpless, nude and unable to provide for himself, Lore Sjöberg eventually overcame these handicaps to become a supertasker, a superuser and a Super Soaker.
Read More http://www.wired.com/underwire/2010/04/alt-text-supertaskers#ixzz0kalk6tCg